Sunday, November 14, 2010

Bad Times are gone!

We have employment! An update on the major changes in our lives to come soon!

Bad times here at the Fairfax household. As of Thursday, Matt unexpectedly lost his job when his company shuttered their doors. They were the whole reason behind our move to Vegas last December, and now we have nothing coming in beyond my disability.

He's madly looking for another job... that may leave us here, take us back to Oregon, or anywhere between the Bay Area, to the Carolinas... but we have to find something.

I am of course, freaking out about medical costs, what to do about insurance, and all of that. Will be putting a call into the social worker here, and probably at my old clinic in Portland to see what my options are. Going on Medicare is an option, as well as Cobra, but we have no idea how much these two things will cost us. I have an okay stockpile on medications, though some I have virtually none.

I don't know where our lives are going to go. And that is terrifying. Though I really hate asking for help, I will include a link to my paypal. Even a few bucks will help us out right now, until we get our feet under us again. I've been in the position so long to be able to help, and have. It's strange and scary to be on the other side.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Dear Eva

Dear Eva,

7 months since you left this world. Tonight another cystic friend left this world. Invite Gess to the party... he may be shy at first, but if anyone can pull someone out of their shell, it's you.

For Good is on right now, playing on my iTunes shuffle. I don't know how well I'm doing, living the life lessons you taught me. Right now, my life is going so many directions, yet at the same time I feel stuck in the doldrums of being sick. but I'm starting on the next big step. My first meeting with the transplant team at UCLA happened on October 14th, nearly a year to the day after I last hugged you. I know you and Jenn were there with me... my CF cysters who hold me when I'm scared.

The transplant team thinks that I'm still too healthy, which I agree with, but they're going to keep a close eye on me... for which I'm grateful for. I am so scared of getting too sick, waiting too long, or suddenly being gone like Jenn. I'm scared for my family, for Matt, for my friends... I need to make it through this, I need to breathe again.

I miss you girl, each and every day. Squish Jenn for me, have a dance party, and welcome Gess. I'll talk to you again soon.